Thursday, July 29, 2010

Final Letter

I'm not going to post the 12 week letter as it addresses the day the miscarriage began last week.

It slowly progressed into the weekend- we still took our trip to my cousins wedding- both knowing what was happening (with midwife's approval too). I have done my best to convey to all my cousins what a fantastic job they did at unknowingly distracting me from much sorrow and pain. I'm not sure when the last time was that I laughed as much as I did this past weekend!

This week has moved forward with more physical and emotional pain. Today we met with our midwife and she confirmed that there was no heartbeat but determined that I am in fact on the mend and healing quite well. I've had good days and bad days this week, but over all am finding much peace in knowing that my body did what God designed it to do when a pregnancy is not going right. We will try again at this baby thing. :)

I wanted to do one final picture & letter this week- at the sunset- as this chapter of our lives ends. Brenda, you've been an awesome friend to do this project for us and be there for me this last week!

Dear Baby,

Precious little one, you went to heaven this week without us. My heart is broken that my womb is now empty, but I know you are resting in the arms of Jesus. That's exactly where I've had to come to rest too. We were already so attached to you in these few short weeks. It's amazing how hard it is to let go of you- someone we've never seen or met. You will always be mommy & daddy's first baby.

All My Love, Mama


Ornery's Wife said...

So sorry for your loss. Holding you both up in prayer. May God's peace surround you. Hugs.

Bren said...

I want to hug you! I am so sorry sweetie, that you are going through this. God is wise in His ways. Please tell Jason for me, too, that I am praying for you both. If at all, this gets hard, please reach out to Ashley....Mountain Mama...she is so strong, and knows exactly what you are feeling right now.

Ale Miller said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Ale Miller said...

I am so sorry for your loss. God has everything in control. Will be praying for you.

Ashley said...

So sorry to hear about your loss.

Kimberly said...

Oh Andrea, I'm so sorry. I've experienced this as well. I pray that you find comfort + strength in the One who is your Rock and Fortress, the One who holds you in the palm of His hand. xoxo

NeeCee said...

I am so very sorry to hear your new blessing has gone to be with Jesus. Praying for God's supernatural peace to wrap you in its sweet loving embrace. I understand your pain. I lost three babies before having my four children. My only comfort was imaging them being held on God's lap until I get there.

Jessica Tankersley said...

Thinking of you this week.

Kim Durham Photography said...

Your all in my thoughts. You two are so amazing-in your marriage and faith. Cling tight to our Father and continue to take comfort in Him. Praying for ya'll over here.

Kim & Justin

TnFullQuiver said...

My heart aches with you over the loss of your precious little one. I too have experienced the loss of miscarriage...5 to be exact. I too lost my first little one. After 21 years later, I still think about what that child might have been and what life would have been like had that one lived. The Lord knows better than me and I trust that His ways are higher than my ways. We have since had 5 precious blessings from the ages of 19 all the way to the age of 6. Our life has been full and richly blessed with each and every blessing the Lord gave to us..even the ones we never saw or held. I will be praying for you and your husband.
grace and peace,
ps. if you need to talk, you are welcome to email me at I'll email you my phone number if you would like.

LB said...

Thinking of you still. Love you guys so much!

Mountain Mama said...

Dearest Andrea ~
My heart aches with you over the loss of losing your sweet baby. Consider yourself tightly (((hugged)))! I think the longer we walk this road in life - the more we see that the only real source of truth and hope is in Jesus and the living Word of God. It is my prayer for you (and Jason) - that you will be drawn more and more into His Word and that you will drink deeply. He will heal your wounds and sadness - over time. And as He does, I pray that you will be filled to overflowing with all that He is. He is our strength and healer - keep your eyes on Him! I look forward to celebrating with you as He continues to turn your mourning into dancing. (trust me - He will!)
you are loved,

"May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in Him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit."
Romans 15:13